let me introduce you to a new and improved technique of the classic favorite, "shmoozing." now, this is unlike anything you have ever experienced and/or witnessed before in your life. this is an art form. this is serious business. this is leverizing in accordance with the grachinator.
v. to leverize, to gratchinate
n. the leverizor, gratchinator
ex. "That family of three totally leverized Stratton Mountain this week; They got upgrades, perks, packages, deals, a table by the window, coke no ice, $40 rib eye, cake to go and 3 free breakfasts for being jewish."
definition.
step 1. there are no organized steps.
- plans must be made hastily and in minimal time frames
- the last minute is the only minute
- travel agent mothers are always a plus
- always know where the nearest Wachovia is located
(and be prepared and willing to drive out of the way to get there if necessary)
- never accept no for an answer
- the customer is ALWAYS right
- don't underestimate the power of sex appeal
- posing as a family will improve the odds
- it's not rude, its assertive
- passivity and silence are your worst enemies
- if you want it, it can be yours
- if you act like it's yours, it will be yours
- be chosen
